Tag Archives: family

London 2017

I have friends in London and thankfully they are all safe after yesterday’s terrorist attack. I felt strange but for some reason, not as strange as I was after what happened in Ottawa, Paris, Brussels and …

I am not getting used to this. I read about the resilience of the people of London, and the UK as well, which does give me some comfort. What does cause me concern is the rise of hate coming from everywhere. Yes, my dad is still on the rampage; in case you are wondering. My heart aches to see loving Muslims automatically apologise for the actions of this British-born man who chose to cause destruction and murder people – a police officer, a mum and four others (five dead 3.45pm). I am not going into the philosophical discussion as to the cause of homegrown extremism; I’ll let the experts do that.

I may seem a bit cold-hearted for not reposting the call for prayers – those badly constructed memes that popped up seconds after the reports came out. Look, most of us are praying already, you don’t need to make this an official command. Our non-theist friends, they too are hoping for peace and a some calm. I will not be one to post a flag on my profile picture, as I have done once before, I have become a supporter of humankind, not one country. Oh, please do not dislike me for this – do not, ever! You have no idea how horrible I feel for the people I know who work in the area of Westminster.

I have picked an odd time to go back to my Christian roots. God does not like what is going on, from all sides. I do not want to hear the comparisons of the Christian God and the Muslim God. My goodness, give it a rest. I also do not like people bringing up the Crusades as an example of Christian violence. No, Christians are becoming more subversive in their treatment of non-Christians, or even Progressive Christians, to be honest. We take this as “okay” and “well, it could be worse”.

It is getting worse. It is also getting better.

I can talk about loving our brothers and sisters until forever, and most do understand. We all know there are those who choose to be hateful and take steps to act out this anger. This has been going on since humans (and their prehistory ancestors) discovered feelings. The weapons and modes of inflicting pain have changed (I will not say improved) but the underlying element has not. Standing up to this anger with anger does not work. Governments will make decisions in which may cause more disparity and uncomfortableness; that is part of protecting their citizens, unfortunately.

I am a ball of emotion. Going through bodily rehabilitation has made my anxiety disorder a bit more sensitive. PTSD is a bastard. Events like the terrorist attack yesterday just hit me hard. I have always known I cannot control the after effects of these events; yet, my brain says I have to try.

Again, my heart and my thoughts (these are allowed) go out to all my London friends, their families who worried, the survivors and especially to those who were lost; their families have a piece missing from their life.

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Filed under Good Parents, Mental Illness, Progressive Christianity

Christmas Wrap Up

Hello!

It is that time of year again for me to complain about not wanting anything to do with Christmas. In some ways I won a little, as Richard has been feeling rather unChristmassy: we did not put up the big tree. My little fiber optic one is filling in the void.

My animals were to get the treatment, but I could not be arsed.

It is not all bad; we are going to the UK next year! I am not sure when it will be, as cost is the biggest obstacle. We do have enough funds to get there, only now we have to save for the visit. That is very much doable.

What to do until then? “First, you need to get the cars fixed,” you say. “Yeah, but after that?” I ask. I need to sit and do research on our destination. Richard has three things on his list:

1. A photo of Buckingham Palace
2. A photo of Big Ben
3. A visit to Stonehenge

I have three times a thousand-million things I want to do. I am so thankful for my lovelies in the UK who will be our hosts. OMGOSH!

On a health standpoint, things are the same. I am still crazy. Crazy in a good way, I hope. The down moments still happen, but you know what? I take them with a pack of pencil crayons or a dash of music mixing. I still have diabetes and rheumatoid arthritis. Though, I have discovered probiotic drops are doing some good work. My rear in review will happen next week; be prepared.

You caught that? 😉

I sent out my annual ‘There is No War on Christmas’ greeting cards. Oh, its usually the same people guity of blaming the Atheists for Christians being oppressed, not realising they are doing to themselves. What would ikkle (borrowed this word from my friend Tony 😊) baby Jesus do?

Not much. The Christians believe God came to the Earth as Jesus to save sinners. In this example, he would be thinking: “I have to add more to the list. Gosh.”

No matter what side you are on during this season, remember just love each other; don’t give in to the hate. As we prepare to celebrate Christmas with Richard’s parents and sister, we remember those who have left us and those who are too far away. Take everyone in your heart, hold them tight and tell them how much you care, no matter how silly it sounds.

Richard and I wish you all a great holiday.

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Filed under Contentment, Downtime, Progressive Christianity, Vacation

Whoopsers!

How do I not be so upset over stuff I cannot handle? This past year I have come across a number of friends who, I think, care. I feel awful that they see my meltdowns. How do I let them know I am sorry?

I think the first step is to not apologise, or not all the time, at least. I can be a funny person, spending most of my day trying to be normal. Strange things happen to me in small doses. Unlike most of my friends, my outer scope is rather narrow. I do not have the travel experience or the broad local friendships they do. I do participate in Envy quite well, I must say.

I cannot stop people from voting for the Conservatives, the Saskatchewan Party, Donald Trump, Hillary Clinton, or Drake. I get emotionally tied to episodes in the news when I really should not. I feel pangs of guilt when I realise my friends and family read my outbursts. Then again, how do we encourage growth and uunderstanding if it is not first the frequent ramblings of a clausterfobic mind?

Writing helps. It works even better when words go in an order that does not sound like they were written by a walrus. I have promised to send copies of my work to my friends, but one of my stories disappeared into cyberspace. Or more like a subliminal disk space. I bloody well don’t have a clue!

Yes, writing helps. So does exercise. Richard and I have started back with the Wii. We may even get back to doing Just Dance and Zumba after watching a Suits marathon. I am still determined to beat 9000 on “Eye of the Tiger”.

One of my biggest problems is promising. I do not not do something, only my somethings end up being too much for my body to handle. The guilt of not getting something out in time, a delay due to funding, or three failed attempts at shipping breaks this girl’s heart. What do I do?

“Just be yourself,” I hear you say. This is me. I will try my hardest not to be so negative, but you do have to let me be bonkers every now and then.

The first thing I need to do is make sure I did not send my handwritten draft of my short story to recycling.

*Crossing fingers*

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Daily Gratitude: Mid-Month Edition

I have not thought about keeping a gratitude journal. I am grateful for lots of things; even the bad stuff. You have to be. I do not believe in the saying “what doesn’t kill you makes you stronger”, because people die in the most horrific ways and those who have survived physically have suffered worse mentally. Kelly Clarkson’s song does not go well with me.

Iam grateful for the people I have never met, but let me vent and make grammar mistakes. I am grateful for my family who vent and I let get away with grammar mistakes. I am grateful for my Atheist friends, my Christian friends, my gay friends, and my friend friends. I am grateful for everyone; even the ones who left me at my most vulnerable, even the ones who walked with me through the shadows.

If you are comfortable, let me know what you are grateful for. With no offence, I find one-offs more genuine than an everyday thing.

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I Am Not Interested In Christmas

That sounds horrible.

I understand the significance of the holiday. I also understand the history behind the origin of the day of celebration itself. Every year I remind my listeners of the date chosen for Christmas. I think it that creation of the holiday that has been bothering me. Plus, the materialness of the whole thing as well. That is an entirely different session altogether, one I do not think I will touch on at this moment.

Why December 25? (1)

At one point I actually felt like not setting up a tree. I brought the subject up, in a covert kind of way, asking Richard if he would ever not put up a tree. He said he was offended that I would ever ask the question. Tradition has ruined Christmas for me this year. This could have been fuelled by my anxiety issues. I guess I am just not feeling it. However, I think there is more to it. My belief in God and Jesus have been ruined by tradition. Those evangelical Christian weirdos have ruined Christmas with their complains of losing their tradition. I have to make turkey for Christmas supper, which is tradition.

I am taking a different approach this year; something completely out of my comfort zone. I want to create a comfortable set of traditions, something that speaks of compassion instead of the same old thing. I wanted to make a Christmas supper like the ones my grandmother used to make, but I have realised that time as passed. I will still set up the tree, play carols, make sugar cookies, the only difference will be these things will all be done to celebrate love and family, not in commemoration of a religious experience. I will still attend service with Richard and his parents when they come up for Christmas out of respect. I will deal with the church thing in another form at another time.

The holidays are about love, joy, food, and hopefully the beginning of a tradition of being non-traditional.

(1) Coffman, Elesha. “Why December 25?” Why December 25? © 2015 Christianity Today, 08 Aug. 2008. Web. 04 Dec. 2015.

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Let’s Teach Wendalynn To Be Nicer

HAY!
image
And a goat. Technically those are shavings, but what the hey.

I was once fooled into sharing a post like this on Facebook:

I now feel like posting this as my sarcastic response:

When I was new to the social media thing (Facebook and Twitter), I was pretty naïve. Naïve enough to post stories proven later to be written by aliens. I will say that I do now check on things that seem a bit eekie to me. I have become a doubter, which has saved me embarrassment and loss of respect. I am sure I have lost respect of others posting the mythbusta links to those who love to boast about a Prime Minister who refuses to not sell milk products to kids deathly allergic to Star Wars.

Though I am a member of the WordPress Congregation, I do not quote its scripture as fact. Just like my posts, a great number are opinions and conjectures. I repost posts as a way of communicating, not as a way to prove or disprove a point. I have a tendency to go to a number of news sources to find “proof” (and that in itself is a loaded word) of a story. Oh, the news cannot be trusted. Oh, the news is too left-wing. Oh, the news is too right-handed. Oh and oh.

As mentioned, I have posted some pretty insane things, and will probably do again. I have become that person you may dislike – the prover-wronger. I hate being that person, but then I cannot stand this:

“Due to the fact that Facebook has chosen to involve software that will allow the theft of my personal information, I state: at this date of January 4, 2015, in response to the new guidelines of Facebook, pursuant to articles L.111, 112 and 113 of the code of intellectual property, I declare that my rights are attached to all my personal data drawings, paintings, photos, video, texts etc. published on my profile and my page. For commercial use of the foregoing my written consent is required at all times.

Those who read this text can do a copy/paste on their Facebook wall. This will allow them to place themselves under the protection of copyright. By this statement, I tell Facebook that it is strictly forbidden to disclose, copy, distribute, broadcast, or take any other action against me on the basis of this profile and or its content. The actions mentioned above also apply to employees, students, agents and or other personnel under the direction of Facebook.

The content of my profile contains private information. The violation of my privacy is punishable by law (UCC 1-308 1-308 1-103 and the Rome Statute).

Facebook is now an open capital entity. All members are invited to publish a notice of this kind, or if they prefer, you can copy and paste this version.

If you have not published this statement at least once, you tacitly allow the use of elements such as your photos as well as the information contained in the profile update.”

Here is the response I have used relating to the above:

But I don’t recommend you do this very often, as it will lose its meaning and intension after a while. And maybe the loss of friends. You will end up appearing like a grouchy old lady complaining about the bus being four minutes late back in 1957. Compassion and tact should have been a better approach. I just make people look stupid and horrible about themselves. That is not proving a point.

I am learning from myself. I still, on occasion, reply with a fact-checked post to something that on the whole looks a bit suspicious, but I am trying to be kind and give people alternative (and more positive) sites to check facts. Blatant hate posts need a more in-your-face responce – a well researched one at least. Disproving one injustice with another is not helpful either. Is it?

I am sure I have posted the odd “give me an Amen” photo back in the day. I used to be one if those people I have started to disfavour. I do not detest or hate the person, just their choice of words. Wait, that means I do hate them. That did not come out the way I wanted it to.

Tuesday, 15 September was one of those days where I passive-aggressively posted this:

image

I noted on the post:

“I’m sorry, but I’ll keep scrolling.”

I’m sorry, I really need to find a way to express my dislike of things like this without being so mean. I think this may be Point 707 on the Issues List I need to discuss with the pastor I have been meeting with.

That along with how I can get the nerve to speak to my dad again.

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Filed under Ethical Treats, Progressive Christianity

Hey, This Niceness Is Not So Badness

I am on my way to being OK. Though I am in need of a holiday, overall, things are coming along.

After considerable thought, I have decided to go the short story route for my book. I do not want to give too much away, but there will be happiness, sadness, and weather. Oh, that weather can be a right ruiner of stuff.

The development of my characters will take place throughout the course of the work. I tried the point plan in character modelling, but human lives don’t happen on paper, so why should my pretend ones? Don’t get me wrong, certain events and traits will have to be carefully documented, like eye colour and favourite jam flavour; otherwise, the rest of it will come when it comes.

Sarcasm will abound. If done properly, it can be funny and biting at the same time. I hopefully will not need to announce when it will be used, like Neighbour/Co-worker. But then …

No.

I am glad to be on track again with this writing thing. My detour was a blessing in disguise. This election has added a new spin on the record. Developing my characters is, in my opinion, possibly the most fun I am going to have in the next little while. I have so much to prepare for.

Until then, I have Christian Persecustion Complex Season to look forward to. That’s always something.

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I Think My Best Friends are Atheists and That’s A Good Thing

Being a Christian, as in all things about being a human, is a blessing and a curse. I know that term has been used so many times in so many guises, but really, it is true.

You don’t agree, I can tell by the face you are making.

This is what those in the circle call a “journey”. I will only call it that once, as when I think of journey, I think of Journey. When I think of Journey, I think of Steve Perry (obviously), and when I think of Steve Perry, I think about tight trousers. Not really the type of thing a good Christian woman should think about.

Steve Perry is in his mid-sixties and most likely unwilling to wear those trousers again. I use the term ‘trousers’ because ‘pants’ in some parts of the world mean ‘underwear’. I don’t know what type of underwear Steve Perry wore. Granted, if wearing tight trousers, probably none.

I gave a rambling and heartached rant last week for which I am sorry to have done. I am looking for the way, I am looking for answers, I am looking for hope.

I am also looking for more clichés.

I have agreed to meet with some good friends and the pastor of one of the last three churches in town regarding my situation. My friend Tony may be disappointed, even angered, by my choice, but I still respect, care for, and love him regardless, even if it has only been for a short time.

That feeling of love is instructed by Jesus, but with regards to me, it comes from my soul. I did not need God to tell me to love, I did that on my own. I do not like some people, especially my former boss. And my neighbour. And my one cousin, And … but they are all loved.

My anxiety disadvantage is not the cause of my problems, but knowing I cannot do anything about it right now is not helping. My family members who rant about immigration and the ‘lefties’ causing the rise of Hitler is not the cause, but it is not helping. In all fairness, those comments have stopped; for now.

I have been reading the Catholic Herald from the UK these past few weeks. You all know that I am from an Anglican background; however, I have found some interesting and soul provoking stories from a Catholic magazine.

OH NO!!!!

I was at a Catholic wedding a few years ago in Saskatoon where the priest said only those who are practicing Catholics can receive Communion. As a concession, the unCatholics were welcomed to receive a blessing. I wanted to walk out. Not quite half the church were either Anglican, Lutheran, or Mennonite – three groups having some if their folk burned by members of the Catholic church at one time or another.

I now find comfort. I am welcome to receive Communion at Richard’s parents’ church with no hesitation or announcement. That is sharing the living word. I have thought about going to the Roman Catholic church in Rosthern, but I will be going alone.

I did not go to bible school, but I did have a great professor, a Zwinglian based out of Luther College, at the University of Regina teach about the origins of Protestantism and the Counter-Reformation with kindness and an unbiased review of both. My religious training (if you will) comes from reading, writing, and arithmetic; literally (Baruk Spinoza).

John Gower, Geoffrey Chaucer, William Langland, C. S. Lewis, Some Unknown Guy Who Wrote Things About Stuff were all influences on me. My knowledge about God and the role of those who preach His word did not come entirely from school, conversation, or the BBC. No, it came from existing.

Some of you can all say where your faith comes from and even where it is going. I have an idea, only now I am recognising the way to get there. Yesterday I posted that I found churches that look like the state of my heart. Here is one from Leross, Saskatchewan:

DSCF8681

Pigeons live in the belfry. The cross is the only piece of hope left.

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What I #CHERISH about 26 July, 2015

This is the final installment of the #CHERISHED #Blogger weekend. I have found this so exciting to do. Thanks to all my Linky friends for the awesomeness!

I actually do not have a lot of “things” I #cherish. People are favoured over items, as I think you may have noticed. What I do care about are those things that can be used, whether it is for their intended purpose (like the Schumann score I highlighted earlier), or this:

20150726_091558

WENDALYNN PATRICIA 18-7-74

This is one of my baby spoons. Unlike most commemorative remembrances like this, this spoon was used. My mum had a collection of spoons with this pattern. My parents did not golden a pair of shoes, but kept memory of my appearance on something that was useful.

I love this!

I was a baby that looked like any other baby. I don’t know if this is me:

Baby Photo 1

Most of the grandchildren on my mother’s side share some of the same features, but going through the folder from my Granma Ballan (my mother’s mum) I have a feeling this is me. An after-baptism photo of me from 1975 was in the same collection:

CCF07262015

In order of appearance: Granma Ballan (left), Granma Jensen (right), and little me (kind of left).

I do not have many photos of both grandmothers together. I think I will add this as another #CHERISHED item. Sorry folks, but I may have just broken the rules.

I am unable to have children, so my spoon will not be passed down to anyone. I do not want to give it away to someone who does not appreciate the memory, so I think I will keep it for a project that will one day get finished. Or started for that matter.

Regardless of how these items end their time with me or me with them, they are #CHERISHED and will be remembered for the moments in time they represent.

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What I #Cherish on the 24th of July

Today is the first day of the #CHERISHED #Blogger weekend.

Today I am writing about what I cherish.

When I told my husband my plan to write a blog post today, he got a bit upset. We had planned to watch Despicable Me tonight. He said I promised. I did not tell him that the #CHERISHED post was to be about him.

1Z

Richard is the husband on the left. That was taken on 5 May, 2007 in Saskatoon. We shared this day with family, friends, co-workers, and other such folks. For the last eight years I have spent my life with him. I can spend another 800 more.

He puts up with my anxiety attacks, my attempt at crafting great projects (which end up in the garbage most of the time), my attempts at making sugar cookies with royal icing. I think he is just fine with the fact that my greatest skill is not getting anything done. I #cherish that.

Richard works with the intellectually disabled at two different workplaces. His full-time job is in Saskatoon at Cosmopolitan Industries, and his second job is at a Menno Homes in Waldheim. His patience, compassion, and kindheartedness is what I value the most. Though his second job was taken as a means to help pay for our house, the joy he gets from working there is seen by the response of the people here in town. That is something I #cherish.

I do put up with the hockey trivia, the spotlights on Star Trek and WWE. Without those moments, I would not have Richard. I may complain about it, but all in all, it is a great time. It is what makes him Richard.

I chose my husband to start the #CHERISHED conversation today, as nothing else can compare.

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