I am in another reflectorary mood. Making up word combos, reading spam emails and wondering why I bother recycling Keurig cups. Yes, I do that; all of that.
I am compiling a list of wonderments. Feel free to answer these questions. There will not be a prize for the most creative, sadly, only my envy of not being able to come up with the answer myself:
1) Bratwurst and potato salad – is the truly an Oktoberfest thing or only in Saskatoon?
2) How do you know when it okay to ask if someone has lost it or has had work done? Moreover, does it matter?
3) I heard a person say they use the keystroke noise on their phone to make sure they press the right buttons – is this an excuse for being annoying?
4) Lager, Pilsner, wheat, IPA, ale, stout, porter, sour, or cider?
5) If you have more than one of the above, do you have a variety or stick to a favourite?
6) Pretzel – soft or hard?
It is amazing what goes through my head waiting for the bus. I am back at my favourite pub, enjoying the neighbouring conversations, the coffee (yes, it is actually good!), watching silent sport commentaries and though recognising I really want a tattoo, I realistically cannot get one. This is all a part of a mind-changing process.
On the mental wellness front (I need to stop calling it an ‘illness’), my course is going well. I am not afraid to admit my faults in a constructive matter. I am slowly realising I cannot always suffer fools gladly and I can bravely say house music can sound awesome with a bit of viola. I am no longer afraid of meeting one of my worst bullies on the bus – my cousin is a city bus driver.
I think it comes from finally kicking my dad’s xenophobia in the balls. I am not afraid of damaging private parts – verbally. Physically hurting someone on purpose is assault. Though my heart will ache with all the ugliness and vileness, I am slowly admitting I cannot change everything. Not that I did before, only now I can say with confidence I am not pleased and I will not apologise, even if am asked to do so.