Another Break Taken

Hi!

I am not apolgising for stepping away for a bit, I have been in need of a brain rest. Today (24 July 2016) is the last day of my week-long break from work. It is my first holiday in almost two years. I have been working in the yard and loving it. I have also spent much of my free time doing some music notating, transposing, arranging and studying the Circle of Fifths:

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(photo courtesy of Wikipedia)

I am making my second Classical music mix. I am nowhere near as talented as those who do this for a hobby or a living. I do not have the gear and the magic buttons on my pooter. Ruddy heck, I don’t even know if I got the terms right. Argh. I was a bit embarrassed to do my first one:

The Bees Knees

I have decided not to compete with the others. I do not have the money or the experience to upgrade to a better system. Then again, do I have to? No. Music is a personal expression and there should be no uncomfortable feelings. I had to Google (which is now a verb and a noun) EDM. At first I thought that was a form of adult “communicating”, however, it means ‘Electronic Dance Music’. I admit this to all of you because I have no reason to be embarrassed.

A recent article came up on the BBC Radio Three website regarding the reasons why some people find Classical music difficult to comprehend and accept:

The 11 obstacles to liking classical music (and why they’re all in your mind) (1)

I want to make my own list of 11 points, but in relation to the electronic/techno/house movement. The reasons can be transposed from Classical to any form of music. I mean no offence to my friends who will be reading this. Thankfully they are great to allow me to not not know very much and are more than willing to answer my questions. 

Here goes:

Gigs are too long – Oh boy, can they ever! Though I have not been to a live DJ show, I heard they can go on for hours. I listen to programmes on the Internet , which are two to three hours. When you take into account a remix of one an Enya songs is just over eight minutes, a gig can be filled with longer diddies:

Here is the original:

In all honesty, the remix is better. Sometimes longer is better. Raves, as I think the nsme still applies, are meant to last almost forevet. I would love it. 

I find the theme song to Friends to be too long.

Gigs are to expensive – An Interwireless device has allowed me to listen to DJ sets from as far away as Hungary, Malta, Brighton and London. Most of the presenters on do their shows free of charge on various Internet radio stations. I have yet to pay-for-listing. I believe they may also pay for the privilege to play their sets. Most of the DJs have full-time jobs during the regular work week. Accountants can be bass-ass master mixers. Yo, baby!

It’s Groupist – To avoid this label, there is a bit of a class element here. I am plain girl from the Prairies who studied music. I was teased for going to a school with no band programme. My knowledge of dance music came via Friday night’s “Electric Circus” on MuchMusic. I sometimes feel out of place when I enter conversations regarding famous DJs because I have never heard of them. As mentioned, my friends have been great to let me ask questions as well as play along. I spend a heck of a lot of time on der Google when I listen to a show.

There is too much stuff to know – I cannot give a comment to this, as I am still an outsider. I think there are “rules” with regards to how many effects are added to a mix. You can have too much reverb, apparently: 10 tell-tale signs of an amateur mix (2)

You feel left out – Like any club, there are those who want to keep the doors closed and only allow someone in who is the right person, that is how human being operate. I have been made to feel more than welcome by the people in the DJ world, and they have been receptive to the music I have introduced them to. Except Thomas Tallis, no one seems to appreciate Thomas Tallis.

I have not heard of anybody – Oh yes, that is me most of the time. I am part of a few music review groups on Facebook and I see an array of selections by artists such as:

and so much more. This is an excuse. YouTube, MixCloud, SoundCloud, Bandcamp, and other music sharing sites are a great way to delve into newness. I have picked up a liking for Gregory Porter this way:

The music is in outer space – I heard this a lot when I first came across dance music, house music and the like. Funny how people jumped on the Fatboy Slim craze, but find works by artists like Taka Perry to be “out there” and “complete shite”:

There are so many Classical composers who were (and still are) treated this way. It has nothing to do with the genre just people being afraid to try new things. Like Thomas Tallis.

There is no “original” music – I thought that as well, but as I mentioned earlier, Classical composers reused their music and others. There are a number of original works done by DJs. Remixes, usually songs released previously, are melded into a one-off creation:

It does not fit in my world – Well, I don’t like Family Guy or Star Trek or Brussels sprouts, but that does not mean they do not fit in my world. I have friends and family that love one or all three of those things, and they are in my world. You have the choice not to listen in the end, however, try starting a new beginning by taking a leap into another universe:

(you gotta love his hats!)

I don’t know where to begin – Do what I did, go to YouTube and be random. It also helps to surround yourself is an odd (in a good way) mix of friends. Take a look at the music they post, there may be odd dance mix or jazz song that is catchy. Look for remixes of a favourite song; you never know what you’ll find:

It is loud, repetetive and no semblance of order – Yes, much like J S Bach:

Messiaen:

Massive Attack:

There is the odd time I just can’t take some of the DJ’s choices, and I too say the music is complex and too big for my brain. It  can take a while for a song to get started and then it does not seem to end (alluding to the first point). But this is the joy of making music. You cannot have symmetry in music, no matter what the masters tell you:

400px-Simple_sonata_form

(photo courtesy of Wikipedia)

I have no closing statement. I will leave you with this:

(1) McAloon, Jonathan. “The 11 Obstacles to Liking Classical Music (and Why They’re All in Your Mind).” Proms – The World’s Greatest Classical Music Festival. Copyright © 2016 BBC, 13 July 2016. Web. 24 July 2016.
(2) “10 Tell-tale Signs of an Amateur Mix.” MusicRadar. © Future Publishing Limited Quay House, The Ambury, Bath BA1 1UA. All Rights Reserved. England and Wales Company Registration Number 2008885., 7 June 2012. Web. 24 July 2016.

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Filed under Downtime, Family and Friends, Musical Fruits

BREXIT – My opinion

There are so many ways I can take this, but I think I will keep it personal. The BBC has a great visual of the results of the British EU Referendum, what some called BREXIT.

The result of the referendum (1)

On Facebook I have a group in my possé that voted “Remain” and some voted “Leave”. Each were emotional, empathetic, bitter, and in some cases down-right mean. I am an observer from Canada, so I technically do not have an opinion; but do I???

Yes, the pound took a thirty-year all time low hit last night (early morning), but I would get four more pounds for a hundred today than I would have yesterday, according to the Bank of Canada. That is not significant, but over time it could be, or not. Canada has just started to come out of a low dollar episode, which I feel directly at the place I work. Québec City did not get an expansion NHL team due to our shitty dollar.

Not that it is the same thing.

I took a lot of guff when I tried to convince my friends and family in Canada to vote out the Conservative Party in the general election last year. It worked for the most part, except the riding I live in voted in higher numbers for the Tories. They seemed to be blind to the fact our MP, Kelly Block, wrote a pamphlet criticising immigrants and denied (though proven in parliamentary papers) that she was involved with the Robo-Call scandal. It seems fear lead people to make decisions, though unpopular, with their emotions, not the wider aspect of the future.

I think the case for the exit from the European Union was made out of the same ingredients. The migrant crisis, the belief in the dissolution of the NHS (much like the Canadian Medicare system), and the need to be British without an extra branding on the passport:

th

I think what scares me more about this whole thing is the fact that Canadians see this as a rallying cry. So many have posted on Canadian media pages regard this vote as a vote for “independence”, a vote for “bringing Britain back”, and “Hail to the New United Kingdom” (an actual quote). Canadians, as I pointed out to a friend in the UK, are a hidden kind of stupid.

523273093

I refuse to pay to use this photo, so I am keeping their watermark on the picture. BTW, this is NOT an example of “independence day”.

There were a few remarks regarding the xenophobia and racism that stemmed from the seeds planted prior to the vote. I will say that not everyone who voted to Leave are racists or bigots or xenophobes, in fact, one has helped me come to terms with my sexuality; just someone wanting the government to have more control over their economic standing. I respect my friend’s choice; I accept my friend’s choice. I understand the sadness and the anger when “hate” leads people to vote in a direction that is different from your own.

Today I saw so many people angry, sad, worried (and some for very good reason). I want you all to know, regardless of what side you were on, you need to remember to love each other. It is very difficult to do, I know. If that does not work, watch this:

(1) “EU Referendum Results – BBC News.” BBC News. Copyright © 2016 BBC, 24 June 2016. Web. 24 June 2016.

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Filed under Family and Friends, Fretting Muchly, Politricks

OMGosh

I apologise for not stepping in here a little bit. Long bit, more like it. I need to discuss my feelings, my fears and my hopes that have sprung up since that awful moment in Orlando on 12 June, 2016.

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I have been busy making stuff out of rocks, string, glue, music and trying to grow vegetables. I was finishing up a gift for a friend when I heard the news.

I have been questioning my own self as of late, and I am excited to be free of holding my true self in a room with no air, but Sunday scared the shit out of me. On Saturday I became more settled in the state of time I am living in. My stories are evolving, now I need to get back to writing them down to be looked at. The weather is making it more complicated because it is so warm. My rheumatoid arthritis is enjoying the warmth and keeping calm whilst carrying on. I have not been reading much lately, but then, summer makes it tough to curl up with a good book. See, real life continues through the questions and the answers.

I have a new haircut:

image

I have decided to go blonde and pink. This haircut also has caused some awful names, the primary one being “butch”.

Some of you may have seen my videos. The videos of me being me. You may only know me through my wordsmithing on der Facebooken, but I have started to open up more, thanks to some great people I have found over the ocean. I have disclosed my secrets, my feelings and my fears. My friends are trustworthy, caring, progressive, and most of all, loving. I am so lucky to have become friends with a great bunch over the Atlantic.

Not seagulls. The ones in Cornwall are the size of oxen.

image

(Photo courtesy of usedwigs.com)

I came across an interesting post yesterday (13 June) questioning why there has been no coverage of the events in Orlando. I had a WTF moment. Being the distributor of useless information, I shared the following link: http://www.patheos.com/Progressive-Christian. Without divulging too much, I got into a bit of trouble when I was told some people took offence to my comment as to why the pastors in Waldheim do not empathise with the LGBTQ community. Let’s just say one church included the fallen in their prayers on Sunday.

Wow.

I have to give the pastor a lot of credit, considering his other sermons which were not even close to kind. One sermon (by the associate pastor) basically said gay people should be banned from the church. The infamous quote “love the sinner, hate the sin” was introduced by one person in regard to how they would handle their child being gay. Yes, you still need to love them, but not accepting their sexual orientation is pretty damn near abandonment. I met some great LGBTQ youth at a function on Friday and Saturday. The love and compassion for the Lord they want to spread across the span of the world is amazing considering their own lifestyle is a grievous sin – apparently. No comment was made when I mentioned God is their only judge.

Richard and I have started our UK trip planning. We are looking at 2018, but I could go over yesterday. Richard asked if I would move to the UK and I would if I could work at my job from there. I am selfish; my job is keeping me here. I have never been so relaxed and content in my job life. I would miss even the most irksome moments if I moved. Moving to Saskatoon is a more acceptable option, sadly. Moving from Waldheim will not take me away from the hatred, but it will remove me from burning something down with my heated, angry heart. There was contempt shown to me by someone who agreed there should be more compassion. My husband and my friends know the true meaning of compassion.

After going over the event of Sunday I figured it is not me with the problem. As a friend said, in regards to the gay question, “things are no longer black and white.” My LGBTQ brothers and sisters who died and were seriously injured left more than their emptiness here, but grieving families and friends. Being more compassionate to your gay, lesbian, transgender and bisexual son or daughter takes a lot more than mere words. A review of your own morals and changes to your reading of the Word may help in figuring this all out. As I told the mother-in-question: “spend some time with those in the LGBTQ community” and suggested a more progressive look at the biblical world around her.

The conversation ended abruptly. Well lady, I’m not done.

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Filed under Arts and Mines, Bullies, Fretting Muchly, LGBTQ Awesomeness, Progressive Christianity

Eye of The Progressive Rubber Boots

Hello,

Here is my latest vlog post. I originally posted this directly to my Facebook page, but most of you are not on my friends list, and because I do not want to leave you out of the loop, you can find my creation here:

 

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I Am Looking

Good day!

I have spent the last week getting our yard to finally look like a yard. Richard and I will be spending the May long weekend with my parents, but Mum and I will be doing some garden work – which she found out about by reading this. I need to pick up some seeds if I plan on growing anything, I think. I should not be putting my mum to work on what is to be a family visit, however, I do not get to spend as time with her as I did when I lived in Regina. Plus, I would like to get my garden started soon.

After mowing the lawn, which was done in two parts, I felt horrible. On Saturday I finished planting the last four juniper plants we have decided to make our back fence. We chose not to share a wooden version with Neighbor / Co-worker, as the cost was mostly beyond our scope, and if there is problem with it, I know there will be a bit of a grumble match to see who fixes it. On a side note: the sons in that house are very good kids, as Richard told me. He works with them in the youth group at his church. Too bad that kindness has not transferred to the dad.

Enough about that.

After coming home on Saturday from the garden place, I saw the lawn covered in dandelions. Every morning I feel a dread of the yard covered with these yellow weeds, and even more seeing the spread over the property line into the neighbour’s yard. Last year we tried sprays, pulling, and mowing, but to no avail. As I walked with my wares to the back, I noticed two bees hovering over a clump of the yellow beasts. I stared for a bit, then went on to the back. Three more. One seated casually on one of the already-planted junipers. Six altogether.

Six bees using my space for doing what they do best. Awe and some!!!  I did eventually have to mow the dandelions, as our grass was getting a bit unsightly. In all honesty, I would not mind setting a patch to be left on its own. My old garden space does get away every now and then, but I am compelled to trim it down so it does not become an eyesore. Maybe I can plant some hardy flowers to help take care of the weeds. Leaving a part go back to nature will help the with the bees. Mind you, the deer and the other outdoor animals may like the stuff here as well, but some of the people living on the acreages just down from us leave bales of hay for the deer and moose during the winter. I don’t want to draw the animals in, however, it is going to happen regardless.

During the first mowing session I happened to glance at the yard across the alley. Raised boxes, charted spaces and a woman hoeing a straight line made me sad. I am behind on the planting. Why does this bother me? Sure her stuff may survive, but it does not make me a failure. I do not wish for a bad crop, as the work and money gone into her plots are still worth every little bit.

My mother is bringing a tree and a pumpkin plant. I need to get my big bucket ready to take the pumpkin in. I have a few squash seeds to put in the bucket as well. Radishes, carrots, tomatoes, lettuce, cucumbers, beans, and very sore body parts are on the order for this year’s gardening experience.

Hey! Dandelions make good wine, apparently.

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Filed under Ethical Treats, Foodie Faves, Gardening Thyme

My Bra-free Experiment Turned Into An Act of Love

You read that right.

I decided to go without a bra for November 2015. It is now 3 May 2016 and I am still without the necessary equipment. Though it started out as an experiment, it turned out to be a shout-out to my hidden feminist self. I asked, “why does my gender need to be defined by my undergarments?” This is why:

Distributing Dignity

As per the mission of the organisation, “Distributing Dignity’s mission is to Distribute new bras, pads and tampons, enhancing the Dignity of women in need.” I for one not once thought a bra confined me to a role of a woman. The lingerie shops do sell some beautiful things, things to make a woman feel more feminine (sure), but also allows her to define herself in her own way. I never thought of buying sexy underwear for Richard’s benefit, though there is some of that as well, but as a feminist, I believe this has everything to do with me. Distributing Dignity is helping women in need with the necessities of confidence and the empowerment lost whilst on the streets. This organisation is based in the US, but Saskatoon has a similar programme, as I am sure most places in Canada, the US and Europe.

We read about reports about the wage gap between men and women almost on a daily basis, as in this example: Firms forced to reveal gender pay gap (1) What we do not hear much about is this: When There’s No Place Like Home: A Snapshot of Women’s Homelessness in Canada (2) Abuse, neglect, addiction and ignorance make being a woman in need exceptionally hard, even more if her self-worthiness is taken away. The basic need to donate hygienic items makes being a feminist even more important. Women on the street are not looking for the next pick-me-up brazier, but a way to feel more like a … woman. I stopped wearing a bra for the same reason, but I realised women can feel just as important and confident with or without a bra.

I also do not shave. Now, summer is soon approaching and it will be time for me to trim the hedge. The women on the street cannot due to various reasons, the main one being availability of razors and a safe place to take care of themselves. I have also thought about having a Laparoscopic hysterectomy (3). I would no longer worry about having my period. Sure, there may be some hormonal changes to deal with, but I am getting used to that with my depression. Women in need sometimes go for months without proper feminine hygiene products. I have donated feminine hygiene products and other items to a drop-off bin at one of the churches here in Waldheim.

I hear complaints about girls and women dressing like princesses. There is a belief, and in some cases rightly so, that these women are selfish and self-centred. There are moments I want to wear a dress, high-heeled shoes, make-up, jewellry, and snazzy underwear; this still makes me a feminist. I do not put on another personality. Women in need and those of meager means have every right to feel like  beautiful princess or not a princess. Giving a homeless woman the opportunity to feel part of the community makes us all better women, better people.

I ask for all women who call themselves feminists to help other women, not by posting a story about the wage gap, but by helping a homeless woman feel like a woman, feel like a person.

I will still not wear a bra. I here the jokes about women who choose not to wear bras and shave; apparently, they are disgusting and should stay at home. I chose not to do both, not to stand up for my womanliness, but for the dignity of a woman in need who want to feel special and more like a woman.

(1) “Firms Forced to Reveal Gender Pay Gap.” BBC News Service. Copyright © 2016 BBC, 12 Feb. 2016. Web. 03 May 2016.
(2) “When There’s No Place Like Home.” YMCA: A Turning Point for Women(n.d.): n. page. YMCA Canada. Web. 03 May 2016.
(3) “Hysterectomy.” Home. © 2012 Canadian Women’s Health Network., n.d. Web. 03 May 2016.

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Filed under Contentment, Just Because ... Everyone Has This Kind of Moment

Yare Me Matey!

I have discovered the awesomeness of caring.

I have spent the last little while complaining that not enough people care, but I have overlooked those who do, and do it without promotion or incentives. Why did I turn my back to these wonderful people? By leaving religion, I left a piece of my humility. My drive for fairness (which caused me a lot of anger and sadness in the past and present) has not disappeared, but I hoped for a rebirth of human kindness. Not spouting Scripture, but common humanist sense has actually become just as powerful and annoying.

Oops, I think I split an infinitive.

I have been asked by a friend to keep a hold on the Lord, keep loving the Lord. I was gobsmaked. I never thought of my friend having such a devotion to God like he does. I was relieved that he still cares, regardless of my separation. Oddly enough, I cannot seem to let go at the same time, even though I wonder if God really is there. Jesus is another basket of fish. My friend cares about me (and Richard, btw) and I care about him, his wife and his boys. He told me to not be afraid of questioning who we are and our purpose. God has His reasons for everything and sometimes we have to be left in the unknown. He also asked for me to not feel compelled to follow doctrine (Catholic, Anglican, Mennonite or whatever), as it can be smothering.

Just love the Lord.

I think my friend helped me find my way. As I can only do so much, worrying over the acceptance of God, in my opinion, is over. God has to take me as I am. I need still be kind and loving, but not a pushover. Oh goodness, that sounds weird. If my non-Christian neighbour is an asshole, I will tell him. If my Christian neighbour is being an asshole I will do the same. Before you get all “OMG”, I will not call him or her by that name. In person.

I guess saying this with my inside voice is displaying the sin in my heart. Having confessed it with my outside voice does not mean it is forgiven. Maybe. I don’t know. Seeing my husband come home in a silent rage over another mindless speech about the horribleness of homosexuality and the wondrous work of the multi-thousand dollar sound system makes me think most people believe sin comes in various sizes – the sin of a committed same-sex relationship is worse than the sin of pride, just so you know.

Knowing my Christian friends and Atheist friends are in this life with me is helping me deal with my uncomfortable feelings and I am here to be an ear and an extra heart in time of sorrow and joy. Whether you give your shortfalls a name (sin) or observe these moments as reason for change, I think that is what God and humans want in the end. Not believing in God is not going to turn you into a demon, but then believing in God is not going to get you into heaven either.

If you feel separated from you church for reasons of politics and morals but want the comfort of fellowship, do not run away like I did. Richard’s father said the new priest at his church (who is a dictator, apparently) is not going to drive him away from his church home. Stand up and speak. You can be the voice for the vocally oppressed. Your church’s constitution allows discrimination of your LGBTQ brothers and sisters and you hate it – stand up and say “I HATE IT!” Though you may not convince the head honchos of your hopes and fears, there may be one or two that will be convinced. There may be that one whose life you save by being strong. That is what I want to be, however, the God that lives in this town shuns folks like me. That will not change until we speak up for each other, support each other, fight for each other and most of all: care for each other.

Love the Lord as He loves you.

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Filed under Atheists Are People Too, Contentment, Fretting Muchly, Progressive Christianity

There It Is Then

My admission of being a Humanist shocked him a bit, but after supper Richard finally understood my anger at religion last night (6th April) at supper.

We went to the restaurant in town. Having gone through a horrible day (our black car has been declared a write-off as of 7th April), I had a meltdown whilst eating my scrumptious chicken bacon burger, chips and gravy. I was angry at myself, my car, my former religion and lastly, my former manager who came in to eat in the restaurant with his family. All these things brought honesty to my decision, an approach I had been so afraid to take before – outloud at least.

I do not think my Nativity painting from Kindergarten would not be well liked by the leaders of a children’s church group today. I thought along pratical and realistic lines. If something happend at night, draw it at night. Jesus was born (as I assumed) at night:

image

Upon reflection, this does look more like a Norse god storyboard rather than the Christmas story.

My biggest argument against the Christian faith is its lack of humamness. Greed, sex, gossip and conceit are part of the Atheist world as well as in the Christian line of cars. These, and other human feelings, are just that – human. I want to live the life I have right now and worry about collecting enough love points to get into heaven. Not anymore.

I no longer want to live forever.

I will be getting my dates for helping out with the SSO this week as there are two main concerts left; otherwise, I am on the list for next season. I may also volunteer at the WDM this summer. My goal to give back to the community is being done in a different way. There is also The Station Arts Centre in Rosthern. There is room for a liitle Humanist intervention here, now all I need to do is intervent.

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Filed under Atheists Are People Too, Contentment, Progressive Christianity

If it wasn’t for Shakespeare, book titles

The View From Sari's World

This April 23 will mark the 450th birthday of William Shakespeare. At least this is the day we celebrate it. No one really knows what day he was born on. We do know he was christened on April 26 and in the Elizabethan period, christenings happened 3 days after birth so it’s a fair assumption.

I thought it would be fun to devote this month’s blogs to all things Shakespeare. And why not? For he hath bequeathed us many fine gifts. The renowned Shakespeare critic Harold Bloom believes Shakespeare invented what it means to be human, and Professor Stephen Marche lectures on how Shakespeare changed everything. Though I am not sure I would go this far, I do believe the world is a better place thanks to the Bard. So the theme this month is “If it wasn’t for Shakespeare”….

Now and again authors will throw in a line…

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Okay, Here’s The Deal

I find out my times for volunteering at the SSO on Saturday. Excited muchly, I am. Also, after posting a photo of the model train display by the Saskatoon Railroad Modellers Group at the Western Development Museum to Tim Dunn (@MrTimDunn), a model villager and railroad fan, he suggested I join the club. Oh, the thought had crossed my mind. I failed to tell him I also have some videos. I had so much fun.

My parents came up for the Easter weekend, which was the reason for the visit to the WDM. This weekend was fantabulous. I did not feel any pressure to explain myself to my parents. They understood my last breakdown, which a few of you had to witness. I watched Richard go to church on Sunday. I did feel a bit sad for him, as we used to go together, but my feelings for what this holiday represents brought back a memory of a recent moment in time I think may have been a hint I was in the wrong place. It took a couple more to finally get me to a different place.

After a busy summer of a job shake-up, it was decided our small group was to no longer exist. Most of me was glad, as it was getting to be rather uncomfortable; not due to the people, but due to the people. Yes, you read correctly. Gosh, I feel silly to talk about this, but I really cannot find the nerve to do it out loud.

Not having the bible school background and to ability to fake my way into promoting the kingdom made some of the sessions unbearable. My secular university education did not prepare me for this. Nobody wanted to hear about the early church in the UK. History of the “church” only includes Peter, Paul and Mary (sadly, no dragons).

This brings up the point about the one speaker at my former church commending Charlemagne for spreading Christianity throughout Europe. After a number of conversations with other Bethany College (now closed) it would not surprise me that this speaker would not know Charlemagne (as stated in writing) committed genocide.

Charlemagne vs. The Saxons (1)

As pointed out by one of the classmates, bible schools are mostly denominational; so the curriculum is somewhat one sided. Fair enough, but nothing is stopping these good Christian kids from taking the time to expand their knowledge of their faith. I got tired of offering alternatives to the “stories”. Maybe my attempt at teaching sounded more like sarcasm? I will admit there were times it was intended.

Oops.

The conversating also became very difficult. Whilst Richard and the other boys talked about hockey, The Walking Dead, comics and The Walking Dead reading comics during a hockey game, I got to listen to tantrum stories and bottle feeding issues. Sometimes I would join the discussion, but due to a useless womb, my additions were rather mundane. Though I have nothing but the highest regard for stay-at-home mums (my mother was one), I wanted to encourage them to step out of their comfort zone for a couple of minutes. Why did I have to conform to their idea of wonderfulness?

It felt like that moment at a family gathering where you are too young to sit with the adults, but too old to play with the cousins. I felt like I did not fit in; it was 1984 all over again.

I can count on my hands and feet the number of times I got the “I’m sorry to hear that” nod. I must have come across as not very bright. I would walk home, though mostly in silence, complain about not fitting in. How do I fit in now?

“Hey Wendy, you don’t have to; you are just fine as yourself,” I hear you say. That is why I feel a separarion is needed. Though I was well-liked for my scripture reading, very few wanted to get to know me. I am more than capable of reading non-biblibal works out loud. I read to Richard in the car quite a bit and he laughs. The SSO will give me an opportunity to branch out.

I don’t think I am quite ready for the model train club, however, I may volunteer at the WDM.

Yes!

(1) Evans, G. R. “Christian History Institute.” Christian History Institute. N.p., 2014. Web. 28 Mar. 2016.

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Filed under Arts and Mines, Family and Friends, Good Parents, Historical Cool Stuff, Learning New and Old, Musical Fruits, Progressive Christianity